Celebrating My Anniversary, NOT the Marriage Kind

Tick, tock…tick, tick, tick….

Native I’ll never be…but a Colorado transplant I’m happy to be. And a lucky one at that.

It was ONE YEAR AGO this month when I packed up my mini-cooper in Dallas, blazed a fierce trail to Denver, and started my life OVER. (well not really, but close enough) Yep, that’s what a cross country move does – it encompasses more than just a new chapter – it’s a different book entirely.

I had a love affair with Colorado from 1997 to 1999 when I attended CU-Boulder for graduate school. After living in the dreamworld of the Rockies, I found myself moving to a small Texas tv market to start my journalism career and “pay my dues” (aka starve to death and cover boring-ass city council meetings). In the back of my mind though, I always thought, “Colorado….I’ll be back!”

Over the next 10 years, my personal zip code and television career landed me in Little Rock, Kansas City, and Dallas. Sure the people were nice (news flash: people are nice everywhere), and I made some amazing friends, but the weather SUCKED! And the scenery – no comparison to Colorado.  One day…my heart told me it was about time I did something for myself. So I opened the vault, found my dream, landed a job with a solid tv production company in Denver – and MOVED.

When you’re a newbie in town, time DOES fly. And to mark my big anniversary, I’m posting the top 10 things I have learned about “starting over.”

1. Learn to be alone – in public.

Bottom line – you must “go at it” alone at first – to have a handful of good girlfriends for the future. The only way to meet people – is to force yourself to be social through groups, outings, meet-up events, work happy hours, etc. Throw yourself to the masses and focus on other “newbies.” It’s a numbers game. Some people will stick, others won’t. It’s kind of like dating – minus the free dinners.

2. Don’t worry about buying a lot of new clothes.

New co-workers and friends will think your clothes from two years ago are brand-new since they’ve never seen them before! It’s quite liberating.  That “old shirt” suddenly looks “new” again. Chances are – one of your new girlfriends will want to borrow it!

3. Pets are like family…usually better than family.

Furry friends help you survive the lonely weekend nights before you know ANYONE to rock the town with on a regular basis. Also, they don’t argue over which DVD to rent.  Even my cat, Waylon, helps me feel safe at night despite having no claws.

4. In your 30s, it’s a small dating world after all.

Even though it’s a new city and you’re starting “fresh”….it only takes about five months until you see guys you’ve already dated before at a local bar. (Asshole Andy and Belgium Boy just to name a few)  Every now and then, suck it up and go on a date with a dude in the burbs.

5. Facebook will get you through the hard times.

Of course you can keep track of girlfriends, secretly stalk old flames, and check in on your siblings. Better yet, you can post pictures of yourself in your fabulous new town, experiencing all its fabulous new adventures….hence making everyone else jealous.

6. If you’re forced to downsize, you won’t miss the extra space.

Trust me, even though it’s more expensive than “your old town,” you’ll be just as happy with less square footage in your “new town.” I’m more giddy on a daily basis because I have one less bathroom to clean.  Less IS more.  And I never miss my old, scary Freddy Kruger basement.

7. It’s fun playing tourist in your new hometown.

Chances are…you’re seeing more in the city than most people born in that particular town. I’m always amazed when I meet people raised in Colorado who have NEVER tried snow skiing.  That’s like living in New York and NEVER shopping.

8. Much of your future success and happiness comes from people you do not know yet!

Weird to think about this, but very true. People walk in your life when you least expect it – they can impact your personal and professional life in more ways imaginable. So be nice to everyone (well, at first anyways).  That bee-atch who at first seemed cold, could actually help you get a job promotion someday.

9. Good friends will come and visit – and it’s easy to pick up right where you left off.

Usually the “picking up” involves wine, sangria, outdoor patios, giggles, shrieks, laughs, then hangovers…in no particular order. Once the word spreads you live in a “cool” place, expect more visitors.  Stock up on tour guide materials.  Before you know it, friends and family expect you to plan their vacations.

10. And finally….one of my favorite quotes (author unknown)…to sum up starting over:

“If you resist change, or hold on to the past, you postpone all future blessings awaiting you on the next level.”

In lieu of anniversary gifts, I am asking that you comment on my blog. Or pass it on to someone who wants to make a change, but cannot find the courage.

The day I moved...

and the state I moved to...

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12 Responses to “Celebrating My Anniversary, NOT the Marriage Kind”

  1. CH
    July 23rd, 2010 at 9:04 AM

    So grateful you made the move! CO is a better place with you here.

    Oh, and six-toed Waylon is pretty fierce with or without claws.

  2. DateClubSheila
    July 23rd, 2010 at 5:29 PM

    Being a military brat made me very transient. I “started over” in the city where I live now nearly a decade ago and it was a very exciting and frightening experience. I bawled in the car as I drove my meager belongings here. Both trips. For hours. But now it would take quite a force to uproot me. That is, until I feel like starting over again.
    DateClubSheila´s last blog ..S- Repeat Offender UpdateMy ComLuv Profile

  3. Eva
    July 23rd, 2010 at 8:54 PM

    I recently celebrated my one year anniversary in Denver and couldn’t have said it better myself! So glad we met!

  4. MJ
    July 23rd, 2010 at 10:25 PM

    I would encourage anyone to make the leap of faith. I moved six months ago to a place I’ve long dreamed of and finally feel like I’m home.

  5. Heather
    July 25th, 2010 at 11:50 AM

    Hi there! I just popped in from the Lady Blogger’s Tea Party and I must say I loved this post! As a woman in my thirties, who is still in the process of my own “starting over” – I can seriously appreciate all of your terrific advice! Thanks- you definitely have a new follower :)
    Heather´s last blog ..Beyond the Pen or Keyboard or WhateverMy ComLuv Profile

  6. Bren
    July 26th, 2010 at 9:40 AM

    Happy Anniversary, even though WE all still wish you were in KC. Miss you lots and always love reading all of your wisdom.

  7. Katie
    July 26th, 2010 at 11:05 PM

    This almost tips me over the edge to moving somewhere new! KC is not the same without you. I’d like these blog posts more if they were live so I could hear your voice and laugh. :)

  8. Charlotte
    July 28th, 2010 at 11:59 AM

    Interesting timing on this one since I’ve been giving some thought to picking up and starting fresh myself lately. Though I have done it before, I’m not sure I’ll have the courage (or finances) to do it now but I agree that sometimes you just have to grab the proverbial bull by the horns. This post is VERY inspiring and definitely makes a great argument for rearranging and simplifying your life and that transplanting yourself in a different city can be the most rewarding experience :)
    Charlotte´s last blog ..will it go round in circlesMy ComLuv Profile

  9. Anna
    July 31st, 2010 at 8:11 AM

    And as one of your new friends, I’m happy you made the move and happy to have gotten to know you!

  10. Esme
    August 7th, 2010 at 3:23 PM

    LOVE your blog! I just discovered it over at the lady bloggers. You definitely have a new follower! Please keep writing!
    Esme´s last blog ..My Time With The DoctorMy ComLuv Profile

  11. Malia
    August 12th, 2010 at 11:52 AM

    LOVED THIS!!!! What awesome ideas!!! THANK YOU!! I moved to Colorado about 3 years ago and I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else!! If there is any more room for new friends – count me in!!! I find your writing absolutely witty. I can’t wait to go though some of your others! You definitely have a new and HOOKED reader!

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